Posts in Couples Therapy
Why Letting Go of Your Relationship Clutter Will Help You Get Stuff Done In Marriage Counseling

If you think the stuff you’ve been holding onto in your marriage to use against the other person or to prove a point and justify your anger is helping you, think again. Carrying your relationship clutter around with you like a prized possession is quite normal, but it’s also a symptoms of the deeper issues in the marriage and it’s really keeping you stuck. Learn why this is so and what you’ll need to embrace to make major changes in your marriage and begin moving forward.

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Why It Will Never Work to Focus on the "Problem of the Week" in Marriage Counseling

I’m continuing to explore the ideas around how relationship clutter is actually getting in your way at the beginning of marriage counseling. Learn the different between first order change (resolutions in the initial problems you’ve come to therapy with) and second order change (the shift in your relationship that heals underlying problems). By getting everything out on the table, your marriage counselor can help you filter through the mess and start working on building skills and focusing on what' really matters. After all, don’t you want an unapologetically amazing marriage? Yeah, me too!

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Marie Kondo-ing Your Relationship is the First Step in Marriage Counseling

Are Minimalism and Couples Therapy connected? I didn’t really realize it, but the way I’ve been doing couples therapy for the past 7 years aligns perfectly with my new found love of simplicity, minimalism, getting to the heart of what really matters, and letting go. Learn more about how to Marie Kondo your relationship and why that’s so important.

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Marriage During Covid-19: 5 Tips for Helping Your Anxious Partner

In this blog post I explore aspects of anxiety in a deeper way and give you an overview of tips to help your anxious partner and yourself move through this experience just a little bit easier. There’s also a video at the end with more practical tips for communication so please check it out and share the blog and video.

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Marriage During Covid-19: Coping Skills When Both Partners are Out of Work

Thanks to all the therapists from all over the place who contributed to this blog post. We’re exploring coping skills when both partners are out of work, specifically during the coronavirus pandemic. This was a question I received on social media and I feel grateful to have explored it in more detail.

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Marriage During Covid-19: Here's Why You're Snapping at Your Partner

“Why are we snapping at each other and how can we make it stop? This crisis is putting us in crisis, and we’re over it!” I know you’re scared and feeling unnerved about our current and future situation with cover-19. Conflict will increase expectedly over the next few months. Don’t worry, it’s only temporary. Read to learn more about why and watch my in depth video with tips.

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Transparent but Vague: A Mantra to Get You Through the Holidays

Mantras, Mantras, Mantras…a great way to help you get through tough stuff. Holidays are hard for everyone for many different reasons. Who couldn’t use some additional coping skills for their toolbox?

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What is Infertility Counseling?

Have you ever heard of infertility counseling?  Not many people have.  It's something kind of new in terms of therapy, but I've found it to be incredibly effective with people going through infertility.  There are so many emotions and symptoms that come in and out during this journey.  You deserve support, guidance, and acceptance during this process, and a qualified infertility counselor can provide that. 

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The Postpartum Couple: What Will Happen To Us?

It's hard to know what will really happen to your relationship after you've had a baby.  Conflict increases for practically every couple and most people are shocked by this.  They don't know how to handle it and start to stress out, which results in even more fighting.  I talk about some things that will happen postbaby, how to move on from conflict, and give you an exercise to see quick improvement in your relationship. 

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When You Can't Stop Arguing

Do you feel like fighting is the enemy in your relationship?  Are you ready to stop fighting all together?  My latest post offers some different ways to think about conflict and why your relationship has gotten to where it is.  Don't give up, and never stop fighting for your marriage. 

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Forget about Spicing Up Your Relationship - Focus on Your Friendship

You've probably heard the buzz words "spicing up your marriage."  This implies that having a predictable or routine relationship is a negative thing that you need to change by adding spontaneity or new activities.  However, research shows that couples are happiest when there is a solid and meaningful friendship.  Friendship is built slowly over time through mundane, regular, every day interactions.  I'd posit that you can forget about spicing things up, and instead focus on building that rock solid foundation. 

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Infertility during Valentine's Day: Making it Less about Sex and More about Connection

Valentine's Day may be focused on sex, but if you're going through infertility sex is the last thing you want to do on your holiday.  In my post, I offer some practical ideas for how to take the pressure off of making V-Day about sex at the end of the evening, and more about the true intention, which is reconnecting with your partner and increasing your intimacy. 

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Why Elf on the Shelf is Good for Your Relationship

You've implemented Elf on the Shelf as part of your kid's holiday traditions, but did you realize it could be helping your relationship too?  Rituals are important in any relationship and will help you increase your positive interactions.  Find out why this is important here and how to do this all year long. 

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What To Do When Everything Your Partner Says Annoys You

Your partner isn't necessarily doing anything wrong, yet everything he/she is doing is annoying you.  You realize that you are about to explode at the next corny joke that comes out of his/her mouth.  What can you do to keep your cool and prevent an argument?  I provide some easy steps here. 

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How to Improve your Relationship with your Holiday Wish List

Don't just ask for the same old thing or this year's hottest item.  Get creative with your holiday wish list and find creative ways to improve your relationship at the same time.  It's a win-win.  What could be more important than making sure you have a solid foundation and working towards creating the most amazing relationship possible?  Read here for some ideas. 

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