Setting Your Relationship Up for Success: Essential Habits for a Lasting, Thriving Partnership
Every relationship can feel like a delightful rollercoaster—there are exhilarating highs, stomach-churning drops, and a few loop-de-loops that leave you wondering, “Why did I get on this ride in the first place?” But don’t worry! Setting your relationship up for success doesn’t require a degree in couples therapy or a hefty investment in self-help books. Sometimes, it just takes that intentionality we love so much. Let’s explore some essential habits that can keep your relationship thriving!
Open Communication: The Heart of It All
You’ve probably heard the phrase “communication is key,” and for good reason! If you want to dodge the dreaded “we need to talk” conversations that typically happen after a long day, make it a habit to check in with each other regularly. Think of it as a “relationship maintenance” session- like tuning up your car, but instead of oil changes, you’ll be discussing feelings and that time you forgot to take out the trash again. It is best to set aside a few minutes each day, at minimum each week, for a casual check-in about how you’re both feeling - lean in to the check-ins!
Set (and Revisit) Shared Goals: Teamwork Makes the Dream Work
Relationships can sometimes feel like a game of “guess what I’m thinking,” and that’s rarely a fun game. So, instead of trying to read each other’s minds (trust me, it’s a losing battle), sit down and set some shared goals. Whether it’s planning a vacation, saving for a new couch, or figuring out how to successfully assemble IKEA furniture without a blow up, having a roadmap keeps you both heading in the same direction. Revisit these goals regularly, because let’s face it, life happens. Who knew that a global pandemic could throw a wrench in your travel plans? If you have to adjust your goals, just make sure you do it together!
Prioritize Quality Time Together: Because Netflix Doesn’t Always Count
We get it- binge-watching your favorite series on the couch while both wearing sweatpants feels like quality time. But scrolling through Netflix for hours doesn’t quite have the same impact as intentionally spending time together. Make it a habit to plan regular date nights, whether you’re trying out a new restaurant, cooking a meal together (with a side of potential chaos), or simply going for a walk in the park. Try to pick activities that require some interaction. If you’re both too busy laughing at your failed cooking attempts, you might forget to argue over who left the socks on the floor.
Embrace Flexibility and Adaptability: Life’s a Winding Road
If you’ve ever tried to stick to a rigid plan in a relationship, you know it can lead to more frustration than a toddler who just dropped their ice cream. Life is unpredictable—so embrace the unexpected twists and turns. Flexibility is the name of the game, especially when you find out your “perfect” plan is derailed by a flat tire or a surprise visit from the in-laws. Learn to laugh off the mishaps together. After all, if you can survive a botched camping trip or an ill-fated home renovation, you can conquer anything!
Maintain Independence: It’s Not You, It’s Me (And That’s a Good Thing)
One of the biggest keys to a thriving relationship is having your own interests and passions outside of your partnership. You both came into the relationship as unique individuals, and that’s what makes you a great team. So don’t forget to nurture your own hobbies, friendships, and personal space- because, let’s be honest, sometimes you just need a break from each other (and the never-ending debate over what to watch next). Schedule some “me time” into your week. Whether it’s hitting the gym, catching up with friends, or finally finishing that book that’s been collecting dust, it’s essential to recharge your own batteries.
At the end of the day, setting your relationship up for success means being proactive, intentional, and supportive of each other’s growth. It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being a team- albeit a slightly quirky team that sometimes argues over whether or not socks need to make it to the hamper. So take these habits, enjoy some laughter, and celebrate the wild ride that is your relationship. You’ve got this!
And if part of you is questioning how much you’ve got this, or you’ve been stuck on how to plan intentional quality time, and you miss the sound of your partner’s laughter, we’re here to help!
My name is Jaimi Douthit and I’m a Licensed Professional Counselor at the Center for Couples Counseling. I love working with couples and individuals who are ready and motivated to make changes in their lives and relationships, who can handle feedback and encouragement, and engage in using the tools I teach in therapy outside of the therapy room. At the Center for Couples Counseling, we specialize in couples therapy, infertility counseling, postpartum mood and anxiety disorders, self-care and burnout, and perfectionism. We help couples and individuals in the League City and Houston areas in person, and all residents of the State of Texas online. Call us at (832) 827-3288 to schedule a free phone consultation.
Begin Couples Therapy in League City, TX
We know relationships take a lot of hard work. But your relationship is important and deserves the effort. At Center for Couples Counseling we want to help you and your partner get back on the right track. To get started with in-person or online couples therapy follow these simple steps:
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Other Services Offered at Center for Couples Counseling
At the Center for Couples Counseling, we understand you or your relationship may be facing different challenges. To help you work on yourself and your relationship, our Texas practice offers individual therapy, infertility counseling, postpartum anxiety, and depression counseling, therapy for self-care and burnout, and therapy for perfectionism. For more about us check out our FAQs and blog!