Therapy Basics: How to Find a Good Therapist
Welcome back to our “Therapy Basics” blog series, where we are breaking down everything you need to know about the process of starting therapy and changing your life. While the topic of finding a therapist is extremely important to your whole therapy journey, you’ll want to check out the first blog in the series, “7 Things to Consider Before Going to Therapy” before you dive into today’s blog. You’ll also want to sign up for our newsletter to stay up-to-date on this series and learn more about what to expect from therapy, what makes good therapy, and take an in depth look at insurance versus private pay services.
Now that you’ve taken the time to process your fears and biases about therapy, thought through your goals, chosen a good time for sessions, set a budget for the services, and you understand the need to find a therapist who is a good fit for you, you may be wondering HOW to go about finding that person. Where do you even get started? Websites, directories, and insurance…oh my!
There are so many amazing therapists out there, and you deserve to be able to find the right one with ease. I’m not going to lie, even as a therapist with a ton of connections in my field, I have personally found the process overwhelming and have wondered “how does anyone find a good therapist without my specialized knowledge?” My hope is this series will help to make the process more manageable because you deserve good therapy.
So where do you go to find a therapist?
1. Ask Someone you Trust for a Referral
I have found this to be the most under-utilized source for finding a good therapist. It may be uncomfortable or awkward to ask your friends, colleagues, or family members if they go to therapy or how they like their therapist, but I’d rather you ask than not to reach out for help. Most of us don’t feel ashamed to ask for a dentist, so we can challenge ourselves to expand out for mental health referrals. Your personal contacts are the best source of information.
One thing to keep in mind when asking for a personal recommendation is that the person you are asking may have a therapist who specializes in a different area than what you are looking for - we all have different therapy goals. If they are a good therapist they will still be able to help you, but they may not be the best fit for you. Remember from our first blog in this series, finding a therapist you connect with is the most important part of therapy. That is why I recommend asking your friends WHY they like their therapist, not just IF. You can schedule a consultation with them to see if they can also help you, and if not let them know you’ve heard wonderful things about them and ask for a referral for someone who has a similar style but specializes in the area you are looking for.
2. Therapist Websites
Reviewing a therapist’s website is my all time favorite way to find a therapist. I know that will be controversial, but I honestly believe you’ll learn so many things about your therapist by combing through their website. I personally write down 2-3 things I want to know before starting my search (cost of the sessions, specialities, and therapist’s style) and after googling “therapist in (city)” or “therapist in (city) specializing in (topic)”, I review about 10 websites. If the aesthetics are off-putting or I can’t find the 2-3 things I identified as important to me in the first few minutes of perusing, I simply close the website and move onto the next.
I know this may sound harsh, and I don’t think this is a strategy that will work for everyone, but I believe a therapist’s website reflects how they show up in the world and therefore I’ve gotten most of what I need from this process. I find it important that a therapist is transparent about their prices, how they work, and who they are in the therapeutic context, all of which can be found on their website. You’ll get a glimpse into their personality, but also some information about how they help people. I want everything to be upfront and easy to find because for me that reflects the therapist’s ability to run their business well and be better equipped to show up for their clients. Even if I found a name through the other methods I share in this blog, I’d personally never book with a therapist if I was uncomfortable on their website.
3. Discuss your Needs with your Other Providers
You never know where you’ll find the name of a good therapist, so I suggest asking your other providers during appointments. Doctor’s offices, dentists, massage therapists, chiropractors, OB’s, and clergy all have a list of providers they feel comfortable referring to. Be sure to dig into each recommendation a little to see if they know the therapist personally and don't be afraid to ask why they feel it will be a good fit. I’d still recommend a thorough review of the therapist’s website and a phone consultation to ensure they will work for you.
4. Consult your Provider Directory
You may notice this option being further down my list than other articles you’ve read. If you plan to use insurance, a good place to start MAY be your provider directory. I say may, because these directories are often out of date or the provider may be full, and I want to warn you that this can become a frustrating experience for most. But don’t give up hope! If nothing else, this can help you start the process of finding the right provider by giving you a list to go from. Then, as stating above, find and review their website and book a phone consultation. I cannot emphasize this enough, DO NOT book with the first person on your list with availability just because they answered the phone. You will get so much more out of therapy by taking the time to make this decision thoughtfully.
5. Visit an Organization’s Website that Relates to your Needs
If you are looking for a therapist specializing in something requiring additional training or something highly specialized (like postpartum depression), you can visit larger websites that have a ton of resources related to the topic and use their directories. The same issue can be true as with insurance directories (being out of date or the therapist not having availability), however this happens less with these directories because the therapists are usually very active with these organizations. This can be a much faster route to making a list of therapists in your area with a specific specialty, and once again - website, research, phone consultation. I think you get it!
6. Phone Consultations
As you know by now, a phone consultation is an essential part of finding the right therapist. No matter which of the previous tips you used to find a potential therapist, you should always call or email them to set up a phone consultation. Ours are free! For the consultation, I recommend having a list of goals, needs, and questions/concerns to ask the therapist.
Each person will have different needs, and it is so helpful to be upfront with potential therapists about your needs in therapy. A good therapist will go through all the options with you, be patient and take time to address anything you are concerned about, will describe the processes and how they work, and should give you a sense of hope related to your goals. I recommend noting how you felt before, during, and after the consultation to see if this is someone you feel comfortable with and confident in their ability to help you. Remember that the majority of what you’ll get out of therapy comes from the relationship between you and the therapist, so that needs to be the focus of this consultation. You can find the most qualified world class expert, but if you feel cringy or uncomfortable during the call, they are not the right therapist for you.