'Tis the Season for Perfectionism
The holiday season can be a very stressful time for many individuals, families and couples alike. The holiday’s can bring out our inner perfectionist. Holiday perfectionism can end up taking over, causing us to be overwhelmed with stress. The holiday season is a special time where we have the opportunity to be with friends and family but rather than enjoying these moments, sometimes we get wrapped up in the festivities.
Every time we turn on the television, open a magazine, or go to a local department store we are being sold the idea of a “perfect” holiday. Television shows are airing baking shows with elaborate recipes to “woo” our relatives and friends. Magazines are selling us the newest home decor to embellish our homes and make them a festive retreat for instagrammable photoshoots. On social media we see our friends and family going on extravagant trips and receiving lavish gifts.
During the holidays we feel pressure to drop our responsibilities and host jubilant holiday parties, cook multiple dishes and bake the most delicious treats. Families spend time and money creating a quintessential family holiday card showcasing all the great accomplishments that a family has achieved throughout the year. We may feel pressure to buy expensive or detail oriented gifts for the masses perfectly wrapped in the trendiest gift wrapping material possible.
We may feel guilt for not being able to provide lofty gifts or adventurous mountain side retreats for our family. Individuals may feel anxiety and pressure around the holiday’s due to trauma, family conflicts, loss, or not living up to expectations put on them by others. The holidays are a time where people naturally gather and converse about events and life updates and this can bring up a range of emotions.
Holiday’s can bring out our worst inner critic, and our joyous holiday season becomes a time for expectation, comparison, perfectionism and overwhelming stress. Many people get caught up in an effort to provide the best possible experience for our friends and family. Others may feel pressure and anxiety about socializing with family and conforming to holiday norms.
When it comes to holiday perfectionism and having an “ideal” holiday season it is important to set preventative measures. Preventing your inner perfectionist from overstepping your peace may look like:
Adjusting expectations around gifts and setting reasonable limits on gift giving
Taking a social media break until the holiday season is over
Asking for help from friends and family about hosting responsibilities and expenses
Setting boundaries about sharing personal events and experiences with others at holiday parties
Creating space for alone time, self-care, and self-compassion